Archive for the 'All' Category

03
Aug
15

I got in trouble with my wife last night…

I was lathering up in the shower after a hard, sweaty day of working outside when I spotted this odd little bar of soap stashed away in the corner behind my wife’s loofa.   At the time I didn’t realize it was some special kind of rejuvenating soap that she’d just purchased off of QVC to moisturize her face.

I thought it was the designated butt bar…

Boy was she mad!

What can I say? J/W

05
May
15

And now for something completely different…

In 1698 a British scholar came face-to-face with the unknown one foggy night while walking the dissolute cobble stone streets after hoisting one too many at the local pub. A malevolent fog bank already had him on edge when a sudden ‘POP’ to his rear spun him around ready to defend his honor. With fists raised, he found himself alone. The only proof that remained was the sudden awareness that the air lingering around him had become most foul.

This British scholar was Sir Charles Phart.

Keep your nose upwind.   J/W

24
Feb
14

How could I forget – anothe free Kindle promo…

Hi folks,

Don’t know how I forgot, but I did.   My first ghost story ‘Touches’ is also in this weeks Kindle freebies from Amazon.   You’re sure to like this one:

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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful

By    Shirley Priscilla  JohnsonTOP 1000 REVIEWERVINE VOICE on November 22, 2004

Format: Paperback

  In this novel we find a young couple, David and Julie.  Tired of the humdrum of their existence, they longed to open a Bed and Breakfast in an old home.
After searching they felt they found just the place in the old Bender house, but they were not aware of the danger that awaited them there.
Moving in, Julie is left alone while David finishes up some work in the city. Julie begins to experience a presence and sees shadows throughout the house. Thinking at first it is only her imagination, Julie tries to lose herself in the vision of the future and their plans.  However, the supernatural forces at work were determined this would not happen.
What was happening here? She had to know as she searches desperately trying to find the history of the house and a possible clue to what was happening.  What she finds out fills her being with fear.
As the story progresses it becomes more intense as the presence in the house brings death and the near loss of her husband. Will they make it out of this house alive?
Wow!  What a ride.
This work is a real page turner as you sit glued to your seat unable to put it down. Heart thumping, you have to know what secret is within the walls of the Bender house; and you silently pray that Julie will be able to battle the forces that hold her husbands life  and their future in their hands.
Horror fans will love this one. Recommended.
Shirley Johnson

 

By    Cathy on April 25, 2012

Format: Paperback

  Purchased this book years ago and never read it. Never heard of the author but the story sounded interesting. Every time I saw it sitting on my bookshelf my curiosity was peeked but i never picked it up. Finally, after it sat staring at me for 30 minutes as I was on the computer, I decided it was time. It was a quick read and I really enjoyed it. I googled the author and found he has written two other books, I Am Maker and another titled Ferryman. I plan on reading these too as I’m curious to see how his writing has developed and they both sound like something I would enjoy.

By    Stacey Harlow on August 5, 2007

Format: Paperback

  This book is wonderfully written. It was an emotional, scary, spooky ride full of goose bumps, laughs, and even some tears. I could relate with the characters, picture the scenery, and enjoyed this book very much. I highly recommend it.
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Actually for the rest of this week, 3 of my books are free on Kindle (Touches, The Secret and Eleven Till Midnight).    Stock up, enjoy and feel free to drop me a line on what you thought!
J/W

 

29
Nov
13

Free horror and paranormal romance for those who dare….

Hi Everyone,

It’s almost over but there’s still time to get Kindle versions of two of my books ‘Eleven Till Midnight’ and ‘The Secret’ for FREE.    Time runs out at midnight on the 30th.   I’m hoping that a few of you might give them a try and post a review.

‘Eleven Till Midnight’ is dark horror at its best.

An atmospheric anomaly felt simultaneously around the world causes a brief disruption in communication and electrical service. After a tense moment everything appears to return to normal. That is until a metaphysical change begins to slowly emerge in everyone. First come glimpses of alternate lives, dreams of different pasts and potential futures so real that they conjure feelings and memories that extend well beyond the moment. But visions of the familiar are only the initial symptoms of the transformation. Minor hemorrhaging signals the onset of the final stage – an awakening to merging realities that is quickly followed by a violent and inexplicable death. As man’s reign comes to a horrifying close, our primary characters must cope with the visions of what could have been as they spend their final moments in a desperate fight to reunite with those they love.

‘The Secret’ is a light-hearted paranormal romance that leaves you with a smile.

Vince Campbell isn’t like other recent college graduates. While they hit the bars on Friday night, he loads up his Civic with ‘Have you seen this girl’ posters and heads out to neighboring towns and states. While they mingle on the dance floor, he searches shelters and morgues. While other guys are looking for a one-night stand, he thinks of only one girl. His entire life: past, present and future, could be summed up as a relentless search that began the night of the Sadie Hawkins Christmas dance during his senior year in high school. That was the night that Katrina Watson vanished without a trace in the labyrinth behind the old Thornton mansion. That was the night a part of him died.

The only lead the cops ever had in Kat’s disappearance was the reference in her diary to some secret she intended to share with Vince the night she vanished. Only one problem – no one had any idea what that secret might be. Not even Vince.

According to urban legend, Kat wasn’t the labyrinth’s first victim. It took the Thornton’s twin boys over a hundred years ago. What kind of mind designs a three-dimensional labyrinth? How can the perfectly trimmed grass and hedges that line its paths never need tending too? Why was the stone wall around it, built to keep people out? Could Kat’s secret have shed any light on the mystery, and more importantly, did it have anything to do with the disappearance of Vince Campbell himself some five years later?

CLICK THE BOOK COVERS TO THE RIGHT AND GO TO THE KINDLE VERSIONS.   Please give them a try and let me know what you think.    I look forward to chats with you here on LibraryThing.   Jonathon Wise

27
Nov
13

Free Books!!!

From now until the end of the month on Amazon.com, you can get the Kindle version of two of my books ‘The Secret’ and ‘Eleven Till Midnight’ for FREE!

Please check them out and post a review.

‘Eleven Till Midnight’ is a very dark look at the end of the world.

‘The Secret’ is a light, fun jaunt through the tribulations of young love.

I hope you enjoy! J/W

21
Dec
12

The Mayan Calendar…

Wow!    Will it’s the 21st.    I guess I can un-pucker my butt and climb out of my hole.   J/W

26
Nov
11

Notable one-liners… answers!

Okay you’ve had a chance to mull it over.    Exactly how well do you know your movies?

  1. Look what I’ve done – I loved him and now I’ve gone and killed him. (Storm of the Century)
  2. I will find you. (Last of the Mohicans)
  3. He will know your ways as if born to them.   (Dune)
  4. Why don’t you put her in charge.  (Aliens)
  5. Get away from her you BITCH. (Aliens)
  6. Give me what I want and I’ll go away. (Storm of the Century)
  7. You’re not a pleasure unit. (In Like Flint)
  8. Make little fists with your toes. (Die Hard)
  9. I’ll have what she’s having. (When Harry Met Sally)
  10. Losers always whine about doing their best. (The Rock)

Some of these were pretty easy, but still if you answered eight or more correct then I’d say you’re well on your way to laying claim to that ever so enviable icon of being a Couch Potato.    For those of you who didn’t fare so well, don’t fret – I’ll have more challenges coming your way.  J/W




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