My review of ‘National Treasure: Book of Secrets’… the movie

I thought the first installment, 'National Treasure' (2004), was pretty entertaining so I checked out the sequel today. By the time I walked back to the car after the movie I was somewhat beside myself. I couldn't help but think of the movie in two different lights. On one hand I had the motivation behind my initial desire to see the movie. But on the other, I have a more comprehensive view of what a movie is capable of delivering. To quench that internal dilemma, I have no choice but to review this movie under two different perspectives.

I went to the movie because I like action, it looked fun, and I thought the cast had good chemistry. I wasn't disappointed. The entire cast is back including Harvey Keitel as the FBI's lead man named Sadusky, plus we get introduced to the mother of Ben Gates (Nicolas Cage) played by Helen Mirren. Going in I was a little concerned that they might "cool up" the character of Riley Poole played wonderfully by Justin Bartha, but luckily they didn't - he's still the techno-nerd of the bunch. And of course Diane Kruger returns as Abigail Chase - the love interest of Ben Gates who combines the savvy attitude of a true adventurer with the quintessential looks of the girl next door. Keeping everything in line is Jon Turteltaub who returns as director to maintain a consistent feel to the flow of the movies. There's plenty of action, location shots and stage setups. But since it is a Disney movie you're never really scared that any of the main characters are in any real danger. And that's okay, especially if you're there just to be entertained. Personally I feel that Nicolas Cage is best suited for these kind of roles (Ben Gates, Dr. Stanley Goodspeed in 'The Rock' (1996), Amos Odell in 'Amos & Andrew (1993) and H.I. McDunnough in 'Raising Arizona' (1987). I know a lot of people liked him best in 'Moonstruck' or in the movies where he plays a more macho hero, but I've always thought him best suited to play the lovable hero. But that's just me. Now from the perspective of wanting to be entertained - this movie hit the mark. I'd have to give it a score of 4.0 on my scale of 1 to 5 (5 being best).

But I also couldn't help but look at this movie for what it could have been. Like so many sequels (all 3 of the Pirate movies and all 3 of the Bourne movies) if you've seen one then you've seen them all because they simply mix in a different villain and location to the same old story. 'National Treasure: Book of Secrets' is no different. The same bunch of characters are on another treasure hunt where they have to decipher an encryption on the back of the 'Declaration of Independence' - oh wait a second... that was the first movie. Well anyway, they break all kinds of laws as they maneuver their way through all kinds of intricate puzzles until they eventually find the treasure. Of course right there on the heels of Ben and his clan is the ever lovable FBI man Sadusky who cuts him a deal so that everyone can live happily ever after. Does the second movie give any insight into the characters that makes you care about them? No... Does the second movie even have a real plot? No... not really. You find out that the villain in this movie, Mitch Wilkinson played by the talented Ed Harris, actually used a rouse to prompt Ben and his clan into finding the lost city of gold. Why you ask? Because Mr. Wilkinson wanted to have the credit for the find (envy of Ben from the first movie I guess). The gold wasn't really a motivating factor. Why didn't Mr. Wilkinson just enlist the help of Ben? Good question. Kind of reminds me of the puzzle and traps to overcome once Ben and his clan were inside the mountain stronghold of the city of gold. Boy there were some doozie traps left behind by the ancient civilization that just about rung 'ol Ben's clock a time or two. Next time maybe he'll follow his dad and mom and take the easy route in. As you can probably tell - from this perspective I wasn't so enamored by this movie. I have to admit that it was probably much simpler to "cut and paste" than actually write a new screenplay, but hey, they got my $5.50 anyway. I know I'm going to catch a lot of flack on this, but on my scale of 1 - 5, I'd have to give this movie a score of 2.5 (primarily because of the really nice chemistry of the ensemble cast).

To summarize: if you're simply looking to be entertained by a fun and sometimes quirky movie - then this fits the bill. If you're looking for something that will prompt a good discussion at the water cooler - then you might want to skip this one.

Click the image below to order 'National Treasure: Book of Secrets' from Amazon.com

Until next time, keep the cell phones off and your heads down low - I may be sitting behind you. J/W

Christmas fact or fiction… part 6

I wouldn't be doing Christmas justice if I didn't include the origin of the modern day Christmas tree as an entry in my fact or fiction series of posts.   After all, what single symbol of the holiday expresses as much or delights more than the long-standing tradition of a beautifully decorated tree bedded with presents for those we hold dear.

When I first thought about it,  I figured the tradition must have sprung from some logical activity. Could it be that presents were tucked away outside, placed in the care of giant evergreens that would shield them from the elements - where they'd be hidden from the searching eyes of our beloved children?   Sounds like a reasonable origin for a tradition - but in this case that's not how it happened.

This tradition dates back to the pagan practice of ancient German tribes who stood before a mighty oak in worship of their god Thor.   Saint Boniface is generally given credit to making it a Christian practice - he cut down the oak and when a fir grew up in its place, he preached to the heathen tribes to embrace the fir as the embodiment of Christ.   His word took hold and so began the relationship between Christ and the evergreen in the Rhineland of Germany.   The most interesting aspect of the tree at this time was that as the practice began to spread,  it was normal to hang the tree upside-down from the ceiling. It wasn't until the early 1500s that Martin Luther gave rise to the tradition of placing the tree upright as we know it today.   Later that same century, decorations found their way on to the tree (usually dates,  nuts,  apples,  paper flowers...)  primarily for the benefit and enjoyment of the children.

German immigrants are generally given credit for bringing the tradition over to the United States.   A prisoner of German descent serving time in Windsor Locks,  CT is given credit for having erected the first Christmas tree in America in 1777.   August Imgard,  living in Wooster,  OH is said to have been the first to decorate the tree with candy canes.   Whoever deserves the credit...  I'm sure we can all agree that it's one of the fondest and most lasting traditions to ever grace the home.

Now that you have the account,  it's up to you to decide.   What is fact and what is fiction?   Until next time,  be wary of needles.   J/W

Wanted… “Ranch hand – must be fit” (author unknown)

I got this in my email and thought it was funny enough to share.    Take it at face value – no offense is intended….A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife. She was determined to keep the ranch, but knew very little about ranching, so she placed an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand.
 
Two cowboys applied for the job. One was g ay and the other a drunk.
 
She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied she decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the house than the drunk.

He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and knew a lot about ranching. For weeks the two of them worked hard and the ranch was doing very well.

Then one day, the rancher's widow said. "You have done a really good job, and the ranch looks great. You should go into town and kick up your heels."

The hired hand readily agreed and went into town on Saturday night.

He returned around 2:30 am, and upon entering the room, he found the rancher's widow sitting by the fireplace with a glass of wine, waiting for him.

She quietly called him over to her.

"Unbutton my blouse and take it off," she said.

Trembling, he did as she directed.

"Now take off my boots." He did as she asked, ever so slowly.

"Now take off my socks." He removed each gently and placed them neatly by her boots.

"Now take off my skirt." He slowly unbuttoned it, constantly watching her eyes in the fire light.

"Now take off my bra." Again, with trembling hands, did as he was told and dropped it to the floor.

Then she looked at him and said: "If you ever wear my clothes into town again, you're fired!"

Now that's funny….   J/W

Christmas fact or fiction…part 5

Before I get into today's trivia, I need to address my entry into Amazon's Breakthrough Novel Contest.   I'm not sure what happened.    My entry was on their website yesterday and could be reached by the hotlink in the sidebar.   For whatever reason it's not showing up today.   Hopefully this is only temporary and you'll be able to pull it up in the near future.   I'll keep you posted.

Today's topic is the nearly comical 'fruit cake'.   Could the butt of so many jokes this time of year actually have a meaningful past?   Is there an origin to that which gets re-gifted over and over?   Was there an original purpose to this five pound door stop?   Is it true that some cultures actually used it to build the foundations for their temples?   The answer is truly surprising.

The history of fruit cake actually dates back to ancient Rome, but my area of interest lies in what we know as the modern day fruit cake.   This "recipe" is relatively recent and only dates back to the early 1400s.   At the time, the travel of ocean going vessels was limited by the storage of perishable fruits in the hold.   Fresh fruits provided the vitamin C necessary to ward off scurvy among the crew.   But as we all know, fresh fruit doesn't keep very long.

The answer to this crucial problem...you guessed it - that solid block of 'cake' that has everything in it but the kitchen sink.   Lord knows that a fruit cake made today will outlive all but the youngest of us.     It provided the necessary fruit (and vitamin c) that enabled the sailors of our past to explore new worlds.   Who knows...maybe we even owe the discovery of America to the fruit cake.   So before you make your next snide comment about the overlooked fruit cake, take it out of the trash can and saw off a slice.   If it was good enough for old Chris Columbus - then surely it's good enough for us.

Now that you have the account it's up to you to decide.   What's fact and what's fiction?   Until next time, don't chip a tooth. J/W

Hot news on the writing front!

I have two quick updates for you today that I'm pretty excited about:

1. As I mentioned in a previous post, I entered my story 'Eleven Till Midnight' in Amazon's Breakthrough Novel Contest.   The first 2 chapters are now available to download FOR FREE from Amazon.   This may be the only chance I'll ever have to break into the "mid-list" group in publishing.   Please take a few minutes to read these first 2 chapters.   I think you'll like them.    Of course, I also hope that you'll post a review while you're there at Amazon.    One click (see the sidebar to the right) will get you to my story at Amazon.    Or you can search for 'Eleven Till Midnight' or 'Jonathon Wise' at Amazon.com.

2.  I was notified today that my short vampire story was accepted into the Amazon Shorts Program.   They said it would take a couple of weeks to get it up on the website, but then you should be able to find it in their digital downloads or by searching under my name 'Jonathon Wise'.    The cost is only 49cents.    The title of the story is 'Survival - The Fall of Post #17'.    As I mentioned previously, this is the first of a series of short stories that depicts the battle for survival of the human race.   I don't think you'll find it quite like anything you've ever read on vampires.   It's hard, fast and utterly realistic.

There you have it.   I'm hoping for the best.   Until next time, remember that everyone needs a break now and then.   J/W

My review of ‘I Am Legend’…the movie

Years ago (and I do mean years ago) I read Richard Matheson’s ‘I Am Legend’. Shortly after that I saw the movie ‘The Omega Man’ (1971 starring Charlton Heston) based on that book. I also understand that there was an earlier movie ‘The Last Man on Earth’ (1964 starring Vincent Price) based on the book as well. This all begs the question: Can a story be so good that it deserves to be remade over and over? For me, the answer is a resounding yes!Now I’m a big fan of ‘The Omega Man’ so I thought it only deserving to compare it with the current remake ‘I Am Legend’. First I want to note the main differences between the movies:1. In ‘The Omega Man’, Charlton is immune to the plague thanks to an experimental vaccine he takes right before succumbing to the disease. In ‘I Am Legend’, Will Smith just happens to be one of the million or so survivors who happen to be immune. Now the scenario with Will Smith is probably more realistic, but I have to say that I like the idea of only one man actually being immune the best. I think this gives the character of Robert Neville that much more isolation. After all, in my mind, these movies really aren’t so much about vampires or albino half-deads as they are about how one man deals with the psychological and physical strain of being the last of his kind.

2. Mr. Heston has a bronze bust as a companion where as Will Smith has a German Shepard. No comparison here. The German Shepard in ‘I Am Legend’ wins hands-down. It’s not so much that the dutiful dog plays her role perfectly and compliments Will’s acting – it’s more because of what the dog represents. In ‘I Am Legend’ the dog represents Will’s last tie to the family he so tragically lost. It’s the physical bond to the life he once had. When the dog dies (in an emotional scene that is a real tribute to Will Smith’s acting ability) so too does Robert Neville’s will to live.

3. Vampires versus albino half-deads. I’m probably in the minority here, but I like the albinos better than the vampires. Why does a plague have to turn people into something they’re not? Why can’t it simply kill them? Why would it give them superhuman strength and make them hard-as-a-dickens to kill?

Now that you have the basic differences between the movies, here’s what I think of ‘I Am Legend’. I love the premise behind the story. It’s a great idea and truly worthy of being made over and over again. With all credit to Charlton Heston (who made several great movies over his career), Will Smith was the perfect actor for this role. He brings a level of emotion and isolation that was lacking in ‘The Omega Man’. The dog served as a powerful and constant reminder of Robert Neville’s anguish. The flashbacks to how all this came to be were effective and placed perfectly into the flow of the movie.

I really only noted a few weak points in the movie. The first was that the director Francis Lawrence, did nothing with some of the traits exhibited by the vampires. Robert Neville stated that the vampires had lost all human social traits. Yet I felt that the main reason the head vampire kept coming for Neville was because Neville had trapped the head vampire’s female companion. The head vampire also exhibited cunning in setting a snare trap for Neville and in the way he attacked Neville’s stronghold. Secondly, I didn’t quite buy why Neville felt so compelled to bare the entire burden for finding a cure for the plague. After all, in this version, millions of others were also immune to the disease. I felt that Mr. Lawrence tried to tie it back to Neville’s last promise to his family – but even that was weak because we never know if they would have fell victim to the disease or not. Third was the bit about Neville’s wife initially testing positive for the plague and then showing negative. I don’t know if this was meant to show the flaws in our technology or just a mechanism to create tension in the audience – but I thought it could have been left out.

My conclusion…. ‘I Am Legend’ is a really good movie – thanks in large part to the wonderful acting of Will Smith and a great story. If you like Will Smith then this is a must see – for me it was his best acting. The special effects were perhaps a little cheesy – but not to the point that they detracted from the movie. On my scale of 1-5 with 5 being a great movie, I’d give ‘I Am Legend’ a solid 4. It’s definitely one of the better horror / apocalyptic movies to come out in quite some time.

Click the image below to order 'I Am Legend' from Amazon.com

In a future post I’ll compare the movie to the great Richard Matheson book. Until next time, don’t venture into the dark. J/W

Christmas fact or fiction…part 4

One of the more meaningful and long-standing Christmas traditions is the hanging of Christmas stockings over the fireplace.    To see a child’s eyes light up at the sight of the neatly placed stockings all stuffed with toys and candy is truly something to behold.   That very fact is what makes the truth behind the origin of hanging stockings from the mantel that much harder to believe. 

Today we relate Christmas stockings with toys and candy for little boys and girls, but it didn’t start out that way – or at least the practice didn’t.    The tradition as we practice it today started in England in the late 13th century.    When settlers traversed the Atlantic to colonize North America, they brought the tradition with them.    But where did the English get the idea?

For once, this is a Christmas tradition that didn’t get its start from the church or the military (see my first three posts on ‘Christmas Fact or Fiction’).    In fact this one started about as far distant from those two points as one can get.    The practice was brought back to London from businessmen who visited the bordellos of Paris.   As early as the 11th century it was common practice for French prostitutes to warm their stockings in front of the fire to add sexual excitement for the clients.    The practice quickly migrated back to London under the “enthusiastic” insistence of those same gentlemen callers.    As the act carried on from single life to married life, and eventually into family life with children running under foot (no pun intended), it slowly lost its sexual significance and became something that the entire family could enjoy (although probably not as much as the adult men enjoyed it before).    From there it grew relatively quickly into the Christmas tradition that we know today.

So in the beginning, the stocking (which undoubtedly didn’t look like what we hang today) was meant to ignite the spark in a man’s eye – not a child’s.    And when you think about it, it only makes sense.    It’s called a stocking, not a sock.   Stockings have only one true purpose – to enhance the sight of a woman’s leg.     And when it comes to a man, there’s really only one thing he’s interested in finding in a stocking.

There you have the account.    Now it’s up to you.    What’s fact and what’s fiction?    Until next time, remember the animal in all of us.   J/W

Christmas Fact or Fiction… Part 3

During the winter years of my youth, you could usually find me shooting down the ice-covered street in front of our house on my American Flyer sled.   In fact most days, you’d be hard pressed to find me anywhere else.   Other than a really good snowball fight, there wasn’t anything more exhilarating.    Sure it was low-tech, but that didn’t mean it was low fun.    Reflecting back on those days got me to thinking about the origin of the sled.  After considerable research, I present to you my findings.

The first recorded use of using “runners” to carry a transport over snow without the use of horse or oxen can be traced back to 58 BC in Alesia, Chaux-des-Crotenay in French Jura (near modern Alise-Sainte-Reine, France).   The occasion was the Battle of Alesia (aka Siege of Alesia) between the Roman Republic led by Julius Caesar and a confederation of Gallic tribes under the lead of Vercingetorix of the Averni.

Alesia (occupied by 80,000 Gallic soldiers in addition to citizens) was a fort strategically situated at the top of a plateau flanked by river valleys.    Its natural defensive features warded off any type of frontal assault.   The only viable option left to Caesar was to lay siege to the city and starve out his enemies.    To ensure victory, Caesar ordered fortifications built around the city to completely close off any means of re-supply.   Archaeological excavations of the site reveal that the wooden fortifications were roughly 4 meters high and spanned a distance of nearly 18 kilometers to completely encircle the city.   The “wall” was completed in little more than 3 weeks.

The Gauls would have to surrender or starve in they couldn’t breach the wall to replenish supplies.    Their first attempt came about two weeks later.   Armaments along the fortifications (wall) gave the Roman Army a decisive advantage against any ground assault.   That advantage led to the total loss of life for the first detachment of Gallic cavalry to attempt such action. 

Fire arrows couldn’t inflect the degree of damage on the wooden wall necessary to breach the fortification.  Vercassivellaunus, a cousin of Vercingetorix, devised a plan to commandeer wooden planks from battle stricken homes, graph them side-by-side to the reach of his arm and then affix runners to the bottom.     The Gauls would strap burning oil pots to the planks and send the unmanned sleds down the snow-covered hill to the Roman fortification below.    The first assault proved the worthiness of the idea and nearly led to victory for the Gallic army.    But before a more substantial attack could be mounted, Caesar ordered the construction of ditches in front of the fortification and then diverted water into the ditches from the rivers.    Such ended the last hope of the Gallic army.   With no relief in site, Vercingetorix presented his arms to Julius Caesar and put an end to the siege of Alesia. 

This is the first record of what we know as the modern sled.    Now that you’ve heard the account, it’s up to you to decide.    What is fact and what is fiction?    Until next time, lie low and let the cool breath of winter chill your cheeks.   J/W

News on the home front, or what I like to call “What’s going on with me….”

I basically have three things going on right now as far as writing goes.

1.  I’m waiting to hear from Amazon on whether they’ve accepted my short vampire story into their “Shorts” program.    I would think that I’d hear any day now, but with the holidays and year-end vacations – it’s hard to say.    If for some reason it doesn’t get accepted, then I’ll list it on my web page www.jonathonwise.com under my ‘Books’ tab.   That way you can read it and let me know your thoughts.    I had a lot of fun writing it, but it does venture off the path of what we’ve come to know as the “traditional” vampire.   If Amazon picks it up, then I’ll continue on with that series and introduce the hero in the second story.    If you like vampires and you like my style of writing – then I think you’ll love this one.

2.  More involvement with Amazon.    I entered my story ‘Eleven Till Midnight’ in their ‘Breakthrough Novel Contest’.    The next key date is 1/15/08.    On that day they’ll announce the top 1000 finalists.    You’ll be able to go in and read / review excerpts from those stories as well as read Publisher’s Weekly review of the full manuscript.   Of course I encourage everyone to read the excerpts (especially mine) and note your review / opinion on Amazon.com.    Hopefully you’ll like what you read, but I appreciate constructive input as well.

3.  I’ve got multiple queries out to agents for my other completed manuscript ‘Last Days of the Dinosaur’.    Lots out there but no nibbles yet.    I’ve been targeting newer agencies that are trying to build up a client list.    My hope is that they’ll request a partial and get a feel for my writing.    A really good web site to check for new agencies is www.guidetoliteraryagents.com      Go to Editor’s Blog and then click on ‘New Agency Alerts’ on the sidebar.    Even if I don’t win Amazon’s Breakthrough Novel Contest (and let me tell you that would be a dream come true) I’m hoping that I make it far enough to catch the eye of an agent.

That’s pretty much what I’ve got going on right now.    I hope everyone has a wonderful and safe holiday.    Until next time, remember he’s checking his list twice… at least twice.   J/W

little johnny strikes again… (author unknown)

A grade school teacher in Kentucky asked her students to use the word "fascinate" in a sentence.
 
Molly put up her hand and said, "My family went to my granddad's farm, and we all saw his pet sheep.   It was fascinating."
 
The teacher said, "That was good, but I wanted you to use the word "fascinate, not fascinating".
 
Sally raised her hand. She said, "My family went to see Rock City and I was fascinated."
 
The teacher said, "Well, that   was   good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word "fascinate."
 
Little Johnny raised his hand.   The teacher hesitated because she had been burned by Little Johnny before.    She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word "fascinate", so she called on him.
 
Johnny said,  "My aunt Gina has a sweater with ten buttons, but her tits are so big she can only fasten eight."
 
The teacher sat down and cried.Until next time. J/W